End of 2010..How I Contributed to a DREAM

12/22/10

“C’mon, you’re gonna like it! I know you will! Just try it…” Simple phrases of beckoning by a persistent Diego Sanchez revealed a world I did not know existed. What world is that you may ask? It is the community of superb, great, amazing, astounding (there are not enough synonyms in the English language to describe them) individuals known as Students Working for Equal Rights, or more commonly referred to as S.W.E.R. And, here I am, a few months later, ready to exhale and reflect on this busy, tumultuous rollercoaster that we have all been put through in recent months. This is my S.W.E.R. family and I will never forget them.

As I was accustomed to doing my whole life, I was just going to stick to my tennis. Go through college the same way I flew through high school. Not being too involved in school activities, not wanting to create ties with organizations or institutions that might create responsibilities that I simply did not want to do. Using my “I play tennis” excuse to shy away any options that might add to my already hectic life. But, this time it was different. At the spearhead of the S.W.E.R. chapter at St. Thomas was the issue of the DREAM Act. This caught my eye like a red, fierce lightning bolt. I knew about the DREAM Act since its introduction in 2001, when my brother so desperately needed its passage for him to have a chance to go to college. In 2003, he would graduate from high school. What happened though? It did not pass. But, I had kept my eye on it ever since.

So, after Diego Sanchez kindly asked me to attend for the umpteenth time, I responded “I’ll check it out right after my practice.” Haha. Always putting my sport in the driver’s seat. But, I did attend. I sneaked into the back of the auditorium-like classroom where the meeting was being held and in front of me stood two men. Diego was one, and the other I had seen before. Somewhere. I could not pinpoint where exactly. “Hey guys, well, my name is Felipe Matos and welcome to the first S.W.E.R. meeting! Glad you could come!” announced Felipe in an excited, Brazilian accent. The presentation followed and as the Trail of Dreams clip played, I had an epiphany. Felipe was the one of the Walkers! When I had heard about the four DREAMers walking to Washington earlier in the year I felt so proud of them. And now, one of them was at STU! At the same school that I attended! Where had I been living? Under a rock? This intrigued me even more to become a part of S.W.E.R. that afterwards I approached Felipe and company to express my urge of this change S.W.E.R. wanted its members to be.

On a funny note, as Felipe was presenting, he asked the students “does anyone know what the DREAM Act is?” With a wry smile, I raised my hand and delineated almost to a T all the intricacies of the bill and its impact on society. With every word that came out of my mouth I noticed Felipe’s mouth basically drop as if to say “How the hell does this guy know so much and where has he been?!” After my statement, I sank bank in my seat chuckling to myself and thinking “They have no idea what I know…” But, I have learned so much more in these last few months. Let’s fast forward though. FLIC Congress.

So, as I stated earlier, S.W.E.R. would become my first school club/organization that I have ever been in. Naturally, I was still hesitant to get too involved just because that’s the person I am. Always wary at first, until I get accommodated. Gotta test the waters before jumping in type of guy. But, of course, I had Diego there to push me in the S.W.E.R. pool and we were off to FLIC Congress!

FLIC Congress was probably one of the best, most educational experiences that I have ever gone through. The entire time, from the moment we loaded the bus, to the moment we arrived back at Miami Dade College Wolfson Campus, I enjoyed every minute of it. I met so many wonderful people and had my eyes literally opened to realms and pockets of society that I never took interest in. Every instance at Stetson University there was something to learn and be aware of. I would even venture off to say that I suffered through “information overload” but I wouldn’t take the trip back for anything in the world.

The best night at FLIC Congress would definitely be the night that the SWERians in attendance united to map out our plan of action for the DREAM Act. We were ALL exhausted from the day’s activities, but with the command of Felipe and Stephanie Wall, we all “put our heads together” and stayed an extra hour and a half strategizing our next move for the passage of DREAM. It was a great bonding experience, especially for me, being new to the whole S.W.E.R. crew and getting to meet everyone. In general, I was still so surprised to have joined this group of talented and task-oriented individuals with their eye on the prize and distinct perseverance in order to achieve it. I felt a sense of identity, where I could relate to everyone in the room. Where they shared the same passion and convictions that I was feeling. And, let me tell you, it was the first time I had felt something like that. It was great.

The days after FLIC Congress are all kind of shaken and stirred in a blender in my head, but two days definitely stick out in my mind like sore thumbs. The historic night of DREAM passing in the House of Representatives and the dreadful morning the Senate tried to kill the DREAM Act for millions of human beings across America. Keyword: tried. In between, of course there were more occasions of S.W.E.R. bonding like the hundreds of letters we took to Senator LeMieux’s office, the DREAM Act debate at the Telefutura TV Station, and our last DREAM action before the Senate vote where we caravanned through Miami in support of DREAM! In all of these events I had a blast and I am thankful to have participated in each one. But, now, to pinpoint those two momentous days.

December 8^th, 2010 was one of the greatest days of my life. I woke up pretty nervous. Not because of DREAM though, I had to take my Psychology of Law final exam that afternoon at 1:00 PM! The hardest final exam I had to take this Fall ’10 semester! And, because of all the DREAM activities I did not feel too prepared for it. That’s not an excuse though since I obviously have mastered the art of procrastination through the years even if I did not have DREAM or S.W.E.R. to take my sleep away, I would have still been unprepared for the test. However, I had been able to sneak in an hour of study time the night before and I luckily made it to campus an hour before the test to meet with classmates who were also cramming as best as possible! In that hour, we probably covered all the necessary topics and I suddenly felt confident of my expectations on the final. I swept through the test and we were off to MDC Wolfson to meet up with the S.W.E.R. kids to watch the vote!

Diego, Monica, Stefany, and I finally arrive in downtown at 5:00 PM-ish and CSPAN is still covering a bunch of crap that we do not care about. Mind you, the DREAM Act vote in the House was supposed to have been in the morning and it still has not happened. We are all tired, restless, and irritable but with our eyes glued to the projection inside the Student Life room of MDC. Until, we are kicked out. Haha. Whatever. We take the party outside and install everything in order to keep waiting. Until finally, the voting begins! The Democrats are outnumbering the Republicans by a large amount and we are cheering and screaming with every increasing number on the screen! We have done it! It has passed in the House! But…wait…that was only the cloture vote. “We will debate for one more hour until the actual voting occurs,” a voice announces on CSPAN and we fall back into our limbo status. The wait continues…

I look around. Everyone is nervous and anxious. Diego is sipping on his usual coffee that he always seems to have. I don’t know how he does it; it’s as if the cups of Joe appear out of thin air. Monica and Stefany are plopped up on a couple of chairs having a conversation. Stephanie keeps calling Esteban “sleepy panda.” Felipe is being hounded by a CNN reporter who has followed him around the entire day sticking his huge camera in Felipe’s nostrils. What am I doing? As nervous as ever, doing what I do best in these moments, giving hugs! Haha.

Finally, the ACTUAL voting moment is here. We gather around the projection holding each other’s shoulders in a form of unity. We are a chain of human beings. In the same struggle, in the same fight. Looking for social justice in these United States. And this chain will never be broken. DREAMers will never die. With each “Yay” vote, our eyes grow larger and wider, already grinning and holding each other ever more tightly. But, the “Nays” are starting to increase and I start to worry. Especially in the Democrats column where they should predominantly vote “Yay.” So, as I always analytically do. I pull out my trusty battle-torn Blackberry Pearl and turn on the calculator. I start adding and deducting the different votes in both columns putting my noggin to use. Ok, now I am more at ease. It still seems like it will pass. Minutes pass by and we are only 10 “Yays” from achieving history! A countdown chant rises above the normal DREAM chants as we are all filled with ecstasy and excitement! Nancy Pelosi finally comes onto the stage at the 216-198 mark, and she speaks. All I finally hear is “the motion is adopted!” and that was all I needed. I scream, jump, kick, and yell in exhilaration! It feels as if I have just won the World Cup or a Grand Slam! The joy rushes through every cell of my body and I cannot help but hug and kiss everyone around me! We have finally done it; the DREAM Act has passed the House of Representatives.

The excitement subsides after a few minutes and everyone takes a second to regroup. Vanessa Nunez is being interviewed by Univision 23. The cameraman following Felipe again shoves his lens into Felipe’s eyeballs and Julio, Rosa, and I just finished giving interviews to Telemundo 51. I have finally calmed down and I look at the road ahead. The Senate. I know it is a tough road, probably thee toughest of them all but this victory in the House has renewed my belief and for at least a moment, I believe we can win. We all get together before parting ways for the night and we pray. We hold hands in a circle and we thank God for what has just occurred and ask for guidance and strength to overcome our obstacle in the Senate. I am not too religious but this was a moment that I cherish deeply. Like we have shown time and time again, the bond that we have created is too strong to break and the circle that we were all part of showed just that.

01/04/11

OK, enough is enough. I have procrastinated on this blog for too long now and it has already been two weeks and a half since the day of the DREAM vote. I can still remember it as if it were yesterday though. I didn’t sleep much that Friday night as all the DREAMers probably didn’t either and I was wide awake fifteen minutes before my 8:00 AM alarm clock was set. I showered, ate breakfast and I was off to Yambo Restaurant, a Nicaraguan restaurant smack dab in Little Havana. Oh, wait, but I had my “notes” on me which I worked on arduously through Friday night. Being the analytical nut that I am, at 1:00 AM Saturday, December 18^th morning I go on the www.dreamact.info website and list the names of all the senators and their tendencies on if they will say “Yay” or “Nay” on DREAM. Yes, ALL 100 senators. I..am..THAT.. analytical. I had to have some sense of comfort, and I did my homework. After about an hour and a half of google-ing the “On the fence” senators and the likelihood of them voting “For” the DREAM Act I came up with a verdict: 61 Yes votes and 39 No votes. The DREAM Act would pass and history would be made…In retrospect, I don’t know if my analysis was more detrimental to me causing me to have created a false sense of hope, but at the time, it was my blanket of opportunity. As I have repeated numerous times: hope is the last thing a person loses.

Well, back to my trip to Yambo. My dad drives me to the restaurant as I try to take my mind off what is about to happen. I go through every radio station not knowing what I want to listen to and gazing out the window at what is known as “Cuba central” of Miami. Nonetheless, we find Yambo pretty quickly and it seems like none of my DREAMers are at the place. I run inside and to my comfort I see Steph and Sam there setting up and Maria Rodriguez ordering her breakfast dish. Time seems to have picked up the pace and it is already 10:00 AM. Half an hour left until the voting is suppose to take place. The DREAMers start to pile in: Esteban, Vanessa, Frida, Aryanne and Aaron, Gaby Mejia, etc. all walk in nervously thinking they are late. “Has it started? What’s going on? Can we see Felipe and Juan through Skype?” are all inquiries blurted out by the DREAMers.

It finally begins. Aryanne on my right and Rosa on my left. We are all holding hands mesmerized by the projector. It is as if we are trying to listen with our eyes. You can hear a pin drop. I don’t know about you, but I originally thought that the voting would be displayed on the screen just like the House of Representatives voting. But no, it was all vocal, spoken voting so we HAD to pay attention. The speaker announces the Senator’s last name and whether they vote “Yay” or “Nay” on the bill. As the senators’ names are declared I try to keep up with “My List” of the voting and I match them. At least I try. The names go by so fast, but I already fear the worst. A few of the key votes that DREAM needed have been announced as “Nays” and my hope begins to dwindle. Until the dagger is pronounced, “Senator LeMieux: Nay.” Boos reverberate through Yambo. That spineless S.O.B. let all of us down, especially after all the efforts that we made in an attempt to change his mind for the better. Anger takes over my disappointment as the last of the senators is announced and I crumple my list of false hope in an instant. “Moving on to the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ voting,” a gray-haired old man proclaims on the C-SPAN channel.

It is over. Simple as that. As if it meant nothing. As if it was just another day at the office. No explanations. No apologies. No nothing.

I pick my head up to look around and I see what I expect to see. Eyes filled with tears of disbelief. Faces of disappointment, anger, and anguish. Our DREAM has just been crushed. In a span of five minutes. I take longer showers than five minutes. But, that was reality. The U.S. Senators had no remorse in their decision to kill our DREAM.

But, I try to snap out of it. I do not want to cry. “Do you cry easily?” Rosa asked me before the vote. “Not usually, “I responded. So, I could not break. In an effort to rally our spirits the people of the restaurant asked if any of us would speak. Maria, Steph, Rosa, and I went up in front of the crowd.

Maria was the first to speak. And damnit she spoke well! It was as if every single word she said was perfectly chosen. As she spoke, Rosa and Steph cracked. They began balling as I hugged the both of them. I was about to crack and start the waterworks as well, but Maria finished. Thank God. Haha. Next, Rosa and Steph spoke briefly in English about what had just occurred, but it was not much since they were both between tears and hugs. Lastly, I spoke. In Spanish. And I think it was the best I had ever spoken in front of a crowd. I spoke from the heart. A broken heart nonetheless, but everything I said I felt. I don’t exactly remember everything I said but I finished with “aunque estamos derrotados ahora mismo, no vamos a parar de pelear por nuestros suenos.” Even though we lost today, we will not stop fighting for our DREAMs.

At the time, I said that in order to send a positive, optimistic message to everyone in attendance. But, all I wanted to do was dwell and grieve. It was way too soon to be full of optimism and all my DREAMers will concur with this feeling. The people in the restaurant, in good spirit, began singing songs and showing us their solidarity in our struggle, but at that given moment, I did not want to hear it. Now, in retrospect, I appreciate their kindness and sense of support one hundred percent.

So, after some brief interviews with Univision and CBS4 I called my dad to pick me up. I picked up my broken self off the ground pretty well, and spent the car ride home explaining to my dad what had happened and talking with Fabby about the options that we have for the future. We dropped off Fabby and we were at my house five minutes later. I walk into my house, kiss my mom on the cheek as she hugs me and tells me “everything is going to be OK.”I briefly explain what happened leaving out any details because all I want to do is get to my bed. And sleep. That was it. December 18^th, 2010-the day of the DREAM Act vote is over.